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September 18, 2008
Birth of a Blog Post
3 a.m. I'm sleeping peacefully, dreaming of no less than the gorgeous Destin beach. It's magnificent, y'all. I'm back on vacation again-- how much better can a dream get? When suddenly, I am snatched out of my slumber by the sounds of one of my children being eaten by a tiger. I know this, because of the horrific screeches and howling coming from the Duke's bedroom. So I abandon Dreamland Destin, and race to my poor helpless child's side in a surge of maternal fierceness. Mom to the rescue- back ye beastly fiend who seeks to devour my child!! I fly into his room, guns blazing.
Well, it turns out, he's just gotta potty.
Really? You let loose those ungodly screams because your bladder was a little bit full? I was pretty sure you were being eaten alive. 'Cause, ya know, that was the vibe you were giving off. Are you SURE there wasn't a man-eating, yellow-eyed predator eating you whole? No?
I left Destin for this, you know.
Gar.
So I get back in bed, thinking "oh, the wonderous, amazing, totally insane brain of a three year old. I gotta blog about that."
Then, because I accidentally noticed that it was 3 a.m. on the clock, I immediately get insomnia. I proceeded, for the next HOUR, to compose a lengthy essay on all the ways a three year old is absolutely nuts. I was wide awake- it was that weird hour that totally befuddled my body. Are we up? Am I done?, it asks. My composition was interrupted by arguements with my body, desperate pleas for sleep, and finally, a nagging, relentless sense that now I needed to get up for the bathroom.
I, of course, did not scream about it. 'Cause I'm considerate that way.
Anyway, after an hour or so of tossing and turning, I finally fall asleep again.
Do I dream of Destin again? Oh no. This time, I am a waitress, working double shifts at some rundown bar, and my feet hurt.
-sigh-
He is SO hearing about this when he has kids of his own.
PS... Oh, and that hour long post I composed in my head? Well, this is not it. I, of course, promptly forgot it the second I closed my eyes. Grr.
Child of Mine , The Daily | By WonderGirl | 10:03 AM
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Comments
I thought I heard some commotion last night.
Posted by: Patrick at September 18, 2008 10:42 AM
last night i dreamed that our dog kept trying to bring a live water moccasin to me
Posted by: nathan at September 18, 2008 2:02 PM
"I, of course, did not scream about it. 'Cause I'm considerate that way."
Maybe so, but you WILL come to an age in your life where it will warrant high fives.
Posted by: Dad at September 19, 2008 12:17 AM
lol... now that is funny,dad...
Posted by: aunt vickie at September 19, 2008 9:40 AM
"I thought I heard some commotion last night"
He probably didn't even wake up huh? Men....
;)
Posted by: Betsy at September 19, 2008 1:38 PM




