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November 30, 2006

I Always Suspected

but now I'm positive that my child was switched at birth. I was being oh-so-generous and sharing my cookies with the kids today (hear that, Santa? Put me on the NICE list, thank you very much), and Czarina took a bite or two and said, "Oh Mama- I don't think I can eat this. There's too much chocolate!"

Huh?

It should be genetically impossible for her to say that.

Posted by WonderGirl at 5:43 PM | Comments (3) | TrackBack

Three Happiness

So, today is good.

I took the kids to the playground and let them "run it out". The fresh air was good for us all. The weather is weird, kinda balmy and overcast- but I know a cold front is moving in within a day or so. We needed to get out while we could. Sometimes I forget that it makes me feel better. It requires a good bit of effort to get everybody dressed and ready to play outside and it doesn't seem worth all the work when I'm tired. But it vastly improves my mood, and the kids! So I chased my laziness away today and I'm glad I did.

Besides the exercise and the breeze, three things made me happy today. The first was a gift from family- a big gift, one that was a challenge to accept. My aunt's husband owns a garage and recently came into possession of a used family car that he wants to pass along to us. I am very grateful and humbled that they want to do that for us, and to be honest, it's hard to let myself be the recipient of such a gift. Ya know? But when you are praying about something, you let God answer it how He will. This car will at least give us the means to all travel where we need to when the baby comes, even if it is in two cars. More than likely, we will use both our car and this one to trade in for a minivan. However it works out, I am greatly relieved that I have such loving and generous people in my life who are willing to meet the needs that God puts on their hearts.

The second thing that made me smile today was a Christmas present that another uncle is working on for my daughter. I won't say what it is because he may want to keep it under wraps until he gives it to her-- but I was moved by his thoughtfulness. I know how special a gift she will think it is, and I can't wait for her to get it.

And the last thing that made me smile was hearing something nice about my brother. There is someone special in his life that loves him very much, and to hear her express that made me feel good. Proud. I am not pinning all my hopes on her or anything, because that kind of pressure isn't fair to anybody. But it gave me a lift to hear positive, kind things about him. I am glad he has somebody to love him like that.

That's all, and that's enough. It's a good day, feels good to smile.

Posted by WonderGirl at 3:57 PM | TrackBack

Indulgences

These are some of the best no-bake cookies around, seriously. Yum. I drool just typing out the recipe.

Cocoa Oatmeal Drop Cookies

2 c sugar
3 tbs cocoa
1/2 c butter
1/2 c milk
1/2 c peanut butter (crunchy if you like nuts!)
3 c uncooked oatmeal
1 tsp vanilla

Boil sugar, cocoa, butter, and milk for 1 minute. Add remaining ingredients, and drop onto wax paper with a spoon.

*As an aside, I've just decided to not look at my butt in the mirror anymore. At least until the baby is six months old.

Posted by WonderGirl at 12:13 PM | Comments (4) | TrackBack

November 29, 2006

Request from the Womb

Latest cravings: jellybellies, pickles, and ice cream. No joke. Not all together, mind you, but still. Pickles and ice cream? How cliche can I get?

Posted by WonderGirl at 2:36 PM | TrackBack

November 27, 2006

Ending Credits?

There are days when I think maybe I've blogged as much as I can. But I am too scared to close the door on it, because maybe that means I'm admitting that I've reached the ceiling of my creativity. But, let's face it, this blog has stunk for a while. I don't write much, and what I do write is mundane. It's more of an update email than it is a creative outlet right now. I don't know what to do with it.

Hm.

I believe that I have more to write. But I don't know if this is the right time in my life to pursue it. And, actually, I'm okay with that. I struggled with it for a while, a little taste of a midlife crisis, I guess. But then I realized that what I am doing, as every day and boring as it may seem occasionally-- is important. It's vital. I can't live my life like I'm watching the clock, waiting for the kid's bedtime. I have to be invested and present in this thing called motherhood. It's not easy. Sheesh, that's putting it lightly. I'll be honest- there are days I wonder what the heck I was thinking, becoming a mother. There are days I am way too selfish, way too tired, to be any good at it. I am as human as the next person, and it doesn't come naturally to put other people ahead of myself. But that's part of the job. I don't always do it as well as I should, but each day is a blank slate. I find hope in the fact that tomorrow I can do better than I did today. And for the bad days, there are still the good ones, when I look around and am proud of what I'm doing and how I'm doing it.

But no matter what kind of day I'm having, I am always grateful, and I know that I've been blessed. I realize how fleeting these days are. And I am content with the choices I've made- including putting aside some of my own personal pursuits while I concentrate on the task at hand.

Anyway, all that to say, I question if this blogging thing has come to an end for me. I can accept the fact that it has evolved over the years, as I have. But maybe as I focus more on my family, there is less of me to give here. It's something that's been on my mind lately, as I must soon divide myself even further, from three parts into four.

Don't worry, this isn't my announcement of retirement. It's just me, airing out some thoughts a little. We'll see how it plays out in the months to come.

Okay, I'm off to check the cornbread. Smells yummy! Enjoy your suppers.

Posted by WonderGirl at 3:05 PM | Comments (6) | TrackBack

November 26, 2006

November's Closing

Hello, good people! How were your Thanksgivings? Full of food and naps, I hope! Ours was really nice. Just staying in one place was quite the treat, although I'll admit having a twinge or two when I called home and could hear the party going on in the background. But, it was a good thing. Czarina helped me in the kitchen, and we made a good spread. I enjoyed every second of it.

That next day, King Pen's parents came for a visit. They just left a little while ago, after a full and fun weekend. We showed them around a bit, shopped some, and visited. Today, we also became members of the church we've been visiting since we moved here, and then we all ate dinner with a family from the church. It was a very pleasant afternoon! It was a good debut to the holiday season.

Oh, let me back up and say that the Wednesday before Thanksgiving, we got an unexpected surprise... King Pen recieved a lovely and generous Christmas bonus! It will go to the root canal that King Pen just found out he has to have a few days ago. Oh well! I wish it could go straight towards baby expenses, but the truth of the matter is that God answered an immediate need within days of us finding out about it. I am grateful for that, and I trust that He will continue to provide for the needs of each day. If we don't have everything settled before this baby comes (like the van and having the midwife paid in full), I have faith that it will all work out somehow in the end. He makes a way even when I don't see it coming, and I am thankful for that. God's provision in this situation was an appropriate reminder to the Thanksgiving season... it really got me focused on my attitude and God's abundance.

Well, I am going to go enjoy the rest of my Sunday afternoon before another week begins. Love and snuggles and leftover turkey to all!

Posted by WonderGirl at 5:38 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

November 23, 2006

Gluttony

The turkey isn't the only thing that's totally stuffed today. Help.

Posted by WonderGirl at 2:44 PM | Comments (3) | TrackBack

November 22, 2006

Turkeylicious.

The Duke woke up this morning at about 6:30ish, which is about an hour early for him. As I lay there, hoping beyond hope that he might drift off to sleep again, I realized how numbered my nights of sleep are. Wah. Just a few more months, and there will be no more sleeping through the night, or occasional late mornings. I dread the sleep deprivation.

Okay, I'm not gonna go there.

But an early beginning to the day is not a bad thing, because I have a lot to do. I'm going to get a headstart on a few of the dishes for tomorrow, because it seems to be the thing to do. Our menu is pretty basic. Since I'm just cooking for my little family, I got a small cajun seasoned turkey breast. We'll have that, sweet potato casserole, dressing, green beans, deviled eggs, yeast rolls, and a pecan pie for dessert. Yummy! I know it will be more than we can eat, but I just can't make myself cut anything out.

Thanksgiving is an odd holiday to me. I guess because it comes so close to Christmas, I never have gotten overly excited about it. I mean, I enjoy it, don't get me wrong. I like the eating, and the not going to work or school part. That's never a bad thing. And being thankful is important. But I always feel like I'm not quite as into it as I should be. Oh well!

Let's see... what else? Oh, my midwife appointment. Since I had the kids with me, I wanted to get in and out of there pretty quick. They were good, the suckers seemed to do the trick- and she's very understanding about bringing your kids. She had a basket of toys, which kept them entertained for a while. The baby sounded just fine, all my stats were great, and all though that makes for boring blogging, it makes for a happy mommy. The midwife was able to address some concerns I have about traveling to Tennessee in the middle of the winter to have this baby-- ice storms, snow, electricity, etc. We now have a contingency plan in case we are unable to get on the roads up there. So I'm feeling good.

In other baby news, my sister is due any day now! Well, okay, she's actually due 12/9, but as far as we're concerned, that's any day now. (Oh, and I have the pictures from her baby shower last weekend, but I have yet to reinstall my camera software on the computer. Sorry.) Ash looks so cute-- I can't believe my little sister is on the cusp of motherhood. It's so fun to watch! She's going to be great. I can't wait to get "the call".

Well, I suppose I should get started on my day. I'll write more later if time permits. Otherwise, I'll catch up with you guys after the tryptophan wears off. Happy Thanksgiving, everybody!

Posted by WonderGirl at 9:33 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

November 20, 2006

I'm Just Resting My Eyes

Good morning!! I am up! This is quite an accomplishment, considering how warm and snuggly my bed was this morning. I wore some new pjs I got the other day and they are fuzzy and hibernation inducing. They may be my downfall this winter. But not today. I fought my way to awareness, and here I am, bright-eyed and bushy-tailed. Kind of. Slightly. Oh, okay, my eyes are open. Let's leave it at that.

Have a midwife appointment this morning, for which I will be bringing the crew. This should be interesting. My plan is to scare and to bribe. First, I'll give them a stern talking-to before we go in (complete with a hint of the Mommy Glare). Then I'll give them suckers. Between those two things, I should be covered. Hopefully!

Okay, that's all for now. Just didn't want you guys to think I've fallen off the face of the earth. I'm still here! Sorta. *yawn*

More bloggy later.

Posted by WonderGirl at 9:26 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

November 15, 2006

Chatter

Feeling pretty good about things today. I took care of some business, which is always nice. I hate having stuff hanging over my head- phone calls I need to make, appointments to schedule, etc. So I used the morning to get ahead on a few things. Yay me. I like being productive.

It's rainy here, and tomorrow it will be chilly. Winter weather is here, I guess! Something about winter weather brings out the cook in me. I put a big pot of red beans on to simmer this morning. I'll add some sausage later, and cook up some rice and cornbread and we'll be set for dinner. We like it a little spicy around here, so I might as well put a few Tums on my plate along with it. Oh the joys of pregnancy!

Speaking of such, it's hard to believe that it is again time to see my midwife. I have an appointment with her Monday morning, and I will be 26 weeks. This means 14 weeks to go! Holy moly. Where did this pregnancy go? I suppose that I have a lot to distract me on a daily basis, but I just can't believe #4 is so close now. We're thinking of names now, and more about how to arrange things when I go into labor. Details, details. I like having my ducks in a row.

What's also hard to believe is the onset of the holidays. I can't believe Thanksgiving is a week from tomorrow! This is the first one we've chosen to celebrate ourselves, at home. No traveling. After nearly ten years of spending our Christmas and Tgiving breaks living out of a suitcase, this will be a nice change. I've got our little turkey, sweet potato fixings, pecan pie ingredients, and cranberry sauce. I have a few more things to pick up, but I'm mostly set. I am going to enlist Czarina as my helper for the day, and we'll do up our own festive dinner.

As far as Christmas goes, which falls on a Monday this year, King Pen has that whole week off. So we'll do all our visiting then. I'm looking forward to a leisurely holiday- not trying to cram it all into a two or three day weekend. I am not looking forward to packing fifty million suitcases and gifts and kids AND my big old pregnant self all into our lil' Altima and driving for five or six hours, though. Bah. You know, we may actually have to strap something to the roof this time! Wow! Hey, whatever increases the leg room. I'll even stick a kid or two up there if I have to. They'd love it. Anyway, despite the minor annoyance of packing, the holiday will be great. And after all that, we can settle down and really get ready for this baby.

Well, that's all for now. Just a little chat in between chores. I'll write again later if I have time. Ciao, darlings!

Posted by WonderGirl at 3:44 PM | TrackBack

November 14, 2006

Loose Thoughts

I've been sitting here for about five minutes, staring at the blank screen, trying to decide what to write. And I got nothing. Sorry.

I could post my to-do list, but that's boring.
I could write something sentimental about Girl's Weekend with my six year old, but I was recently told I'm a bit dramatic, so I'm pouting.
I could put up my pictures from the weekend, but I'd have to reinstall my camera software on the computer and I'm too lazy right now.
I could write about the changing leaves, the sense of Christmas coming, and the increasing movements from the wee babe... but that's all feeling a little too Chicken Soup for the Soulish.

I'll tell you what I'd like to be doing right now. I'd like to go catch a movie and then go Christmas shopping. Oh, and I'd like to go shopping for me, too, while I'm at it. I'm just saying. I need some new pants. Since it's a fantasy day, might as well include a little something for moi. Some gourmet ice cream would hit the spot, too.

-sigh-

I'm feeling ansy.

I like B'ham- you guys have heard me going on about it enough to know that. We've been here six months now, and I'm at that point where I should be settling in a little more. But I'm holding back. I don't know if it's the pregnancy or what, but part of me just doesn't want to put my roots down all the way. Ultimately, we want to live back in King Pen's hometown- that's our goal. We thought we'd be here in B'ham for at least three to five years... but that timeline is feeling less satisfactory to me these days. I wanna go home. I want the benefit of aunts and uncles and cousins and grandparents! Maybe it's that I'm a little spooked by the idea of being on our own with four kids... maybe I wish our support system was a bit closer at hand. But it's not all that. I miss being around people who know me, and love me. I realize that is partly due to reestablishing ourselves in a new town- it takes time to get to know people and feel like you "belong". It actually takes work and effort on my part, and I'll be honest, I haven't tried all that hard. And we've moved enough for me to know that at the 6 month mark, I get pretty homesick. But this feels different. I'm tired of being transitional. Ya know? I want a house, in a town that we won't leave again. I want friends I don't have to worry about abandoning in a few years. I want to be in for the long haul. Part of me doesn't want to invest myself here, because I know it's not forever.

Can we stop now? Can we be done working so hard to accomplish our goals and just reach them now? We've spent five years in school, and then how many more here just so that we can move home? We want our kids to have the extended family we both had as children, but by the time we do it, I'm afraid we'll have missed so much. I don't wanna miss anything else.

Well, I didn't mean to go off on that topic. But I guess it's been on my mind more with the holidays coming up. I'll end here... no moping for me today.

Have a good Tuesday, everybody!

Posted by WonderGirl at 2:30 PM | Comments (7) | TrackBack

November 9, 2006

The 3 o'clock Connection

Plan for the weekend: Girl's Trip. Me and Czarina. We are going to my sister's baby shower on Saturday in my hometown, and the boys are not invited. Sorry, fellas! We are packing our pink suitcases, choosing our special stuffed animals for the car ride, and painting our fingernails for the big occasion. I predict pinky, curly, girly fun. I will be taking pictures.

And speaking of pictures, I promised a few the other day, and I am a woman of my word. Here they are: (Update- I've obviously done something wrong on the pop-up images, so don't bother clicking for the larger one. Sorry! I'll see if I can fix it... uh, later. No patience now.)

This is the gang before church:

More---->

Continue reading "The 3 o'clock Connection"

Posted by WonderGirl at 3:38 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack

Gimme a Minute

Oh, the agony of groggily making that first cup of coffee in the morning, only to find there is NO SUGAR IN THE HOUSE. It was so vexing, and that coffee was so vital this morning, and my sweet tooth is so finicky about sugar, that I dragged myself to the local pharmacy/food mart.

It wasn't pretty.

In an effort to make myself presentable, I threw some clothes on over my pajamas and rubbed my face with my hand. (See, I told you it wasn't pretty.) I growled the whole way there, kind of a low, rumbling warning to anyone or anything to cross my path. I managed to avoid human contact until the very end, where I knew I'd have to exchange some form of communication with the clerk. I tried to put out a "just let me pay" vibe, but his radar was apparently off today.

"So, you skipping school today, kiddo?" he asks cheerily.

I snort.

"Well, that's not much of an answer, now is it?"

I raise an eyebrow, and mumble something about sugar for my coffee.

"Oh, they're letting kids drink coffee these days?"

We've done this before, this particular cashier and me. It's his line, and you're supposed to be all flattered that he thinks you look sixteen. Under normal circumstances, it's a pleasant banter that leaves everybody happy. But there is no way on this green earth that I looked sixteen walking in there this morning. I looked like a grumpy, pregnant, sleepy woman who had been on the bad end of a bar fight. And we both knew it.

But I forced a smile anyway, suppressed my inner grouch, and replied through clenched teeth, "Yeah, it's part of a nutritional breakfast."

I tried not to snatch the bag from his hands in my hurry to leave.

Morning people. They just don't get it, do they?

Posted by WonderGirl at 10:04 AM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

November 8, 2006

Me Lucky Charms

I've been working on my "labor music", compilations of songs that I hope keep me from throwing things and cursing like a sailor during childbirth. I've noticed that I keep coming back to celtic music. I do love me some Irish music.

What is it about Irish music that is so heartbreaking? The haunting melodies sung in the clearest, sweetest voices- it's almost unbearable. You can hear centuries of history in the notes, the struggles and endurance of the Irish people translated into stanzas. Great loves, great wars, great losses... they are immortalized in the anthems of Irish ballads.

But for the saddest, sweetest lullabies, they also produce some of the happiest, merriest tunes that lift the heart. Stomping jigs that invigorate, that compel at the very least, a smile and a tap of your foot, and at the most, a chug of Guinness and a humorous attempt to become the next Lord of the Dance. Nothing says celebration and love of life quite like an Irish song.

The Irish people aren't afraid to feel through their music, and it's one of the things that makes their songs timeless and universal. It never fails to move me in some way. I'm hoping that the happy feelings it invokes can reach through the challenges of labor as well. I may even wear green for luck.

Anyway... that's my random ending thought for the day. I'm off to bed, where I am sure to dream of pink hearts, yellow moons, and orange stars. Oh, and green clovers, of course.

Nighty night.

Posted by WonderGirl at 10:06 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

Telling of Time

How I have missed you all! I feel somewhat severed from the world when I can't come here and write. So what shall it be today? I could do the huge catch-up post, where I bring everybody up to date on what I've been doing the last few weeks. That gets so old, though. Halloween, company, yada yada yada... I mean, yeah, it's informative, and you're all dying to know how much candy I've eaten in the last few days, I just know it. But I get bored with the update. Reading it, and writing it. I'll make you a deal. I'll post some pictures in the next post- and let's call it even. At the moment, I just need to clear out my head a little.

I am sitting on the deck right now, as Czarina completes some worksheets and HeroBoy plays outside. It feels good out here, and I needed the fresh air. The fall colors are beautiful! I am hoping to absorb some of those vibrant hues, because I am feeling a bit faded lately- mentally and physically. The pregnancy is going okay- textbook, no complaints. The kids are good, homeschooling is fine, everything is really just, well... fine. But I still find myself blue on occasion. I think of taking a walk by myself somewhere, out in the autumn kaleidoscope. I think of going to a movie with my sisters. I think of making Thanksgiving dinner, finishing my Christmas projects, calling the people in my life that I've neglected lately. I think of all the things I want to do and all the things I need to do and I retreat a little because it just makes me tired. When I walk past a mirror, I can see it reflected in my face now, and that bothers me. I feel pale. Shadowy.

So I sit outside, watching big yellow leaves drifting from the trees like falling stars, and I make my wish. That the light and breeze will chase away my melancholy, and leave me with peace. Because that's what I really want. I don't want to be encumbered anymore by the past, and I don't want to be afraid of the future. I want to know there is time for everything. Time to learn to love more deeply, to forgive more completely. Time to explore and enjoy and savor life. Time to care about others more, to care for myself more. Time to do the things I want to do, time to do the things I should do- and time to learn the difference between them. Time to learn when to speak, when to listen. When to hold on tight, and when to let go.

I can't think of a way to finish that thought. So I think instead, I'll let just let it be. I'll make myself a cup of hot chocolate, and enjoy the sights and sounds that herald the end of one season, and the beginning of another.

Funny, that. Even nature answers to the dictates of time.

Good to be back, by the way. I really did miss you. More writing in the days to come... things are better and brighter when there aren't so many words stuck in my head with nowhere to go.

Posted by WonderGirl at 1:31 PM | Comments (1) | TrackBack

November 7, 2006

Huh?

What? Suddenly I have internet access? I so do not understand what is wrong with my computer right now!

I'll be on again in a little while if I can. Teeth brushing and tuck-ins to attend to.

Posted by WonderGirl at 8:35 PM | Comments (2) | TrackBack

November 2, 2006

Over Coffee

Ahh.... good morning! Sit on the couch with me and let's watch some cartoons in our fuzzy socks, mkay? (That would be the Starbucks talking. Sorry. My aunt passed along a few packages of SB coffee and now my house smells overpriced but delicious! But what's with the line forming in the kitchen? Who are those people?)

We've been hitting it hard and heavy lately. We've had lots of company, lots of events, lots of living. It's been fun! But it doesn't leave much room for blogging, unfortunately. I do have some pictures to share though! But, since we're rebuilding the computer, I can't get to them. I'll post them when I can, I promise. Sorry for the setup, there.

In other news, I've begun my hypnobirthing practice. I'm halfway through the book, and I've started listening to the cd at night before bed. It's really exciting! I have always been fascinated with the brain, and the ability of our thoughts to affect our physiological state. And I don't mean that in a new agey kind of way. I'm talking about normal, accepted concepts like flight/fight, sexual arousal, etc. How merely thinking a particular thought causes our eyes to dilate, blood to flow, etc. Wow. We are such complex, amazing beings! I'm looking forward to exploring hypnosis as a pain management technique. I'm sold. I realize it's a little out there... but there are lots of things in life that are on the edges of our understanding. It's what keeps things interesting. The unexplored. Unexplained.

Anyway. I'm taking all the exercises seriously, giving my all during the sessions, because I think to make it work, you can't half do it. I'm getting as zen as I can. I've channeled my inner buddha. I've got windchimes, sand gardens, rock fountains and incense.

Okay, I don't have all that stuff.

But I've got starbucks coffee and fuzzy socks. Hey, you zen your way, I'll zen mine. Maybe I should think about investing in an orange robe, though. You can't be truly meditative without one of those.

Onward.

I'd like to send out a shout out (oh, how I love the shout out!) to my sister Brittany, who graduates today from the Paul Mitchell Institute for Doing Hair. She dons a fashionable cap and gown, and hits the runway tonight, scissors in hand. I think there's even a dj. And who knew they made fitted graduation robes? Too cool for me.

I am so proud of Britt. *sniff* She's worked very hard and made lots of sacrifices to see this day. She already has a job lined up at a trendy little salon, and is well on her way to great things. Well done, sweetie. And when you make it big, styling runway models and celebutantes, don't forget the little people who need free haircuts at family reunions and Christmas. :)

Okay, time to get moving. Coffee's cold, and that means it's time to get started on my day. I'll post again later if I can. Have a happy Thursday, folks!

Posted by WonderGirl at 10:14 AM | Comments (3) | TrackBack